Someone found it in a mall and brought it to my address. The office staff emailed me, but I’ll have to wait til tomorrow to talk to someone. I’m hoping that this means that my driver’s license is there, and maybe my keys. I’ve already mourned the loss of my phone, but if it’s in there that will be kind of awesome.
When you build a structure, you have to have a solid foundation, preferably one that’s had time to settle and firm up to the point where you can build on it. That’s my assumption, anyway; I’m no structural engineer. It just seems logical.
My first marriage had little to no foundation but it lasted 8 years. We had known each other literally only three months before we headed towards matrimony, and gradually came to realize over the course of those years that we barely knew each other at all. Those of you who knew me in those last few months of that situation knew that I was dedicated to making it work even to the detriment of my own emotional and physical health, until I realized that my kids needed a father who wasn’t constantly dwelling on the benefits of his own demise.
Around that time (and I’ve written about this elsewhere), I discovered podcasts. (Thanks to Ben and Erica for that initial exposure.) This community, even then, was very focused on the medium, and for good reason — in a lot of cases, we got to actually hear the people we followed on Twitter and eventually Tumblr in real-time. For me, in my isolation and the upheaval of my life, the voices of my “friends” became an anchor to this plane of existence. Somewhere along the way, I stopped using quotation marks around “friends.”
Emergency Pants was the first place I heard the laugh that will be my favorite sound for the rest of my life. Even then I knew that when Bridget laughs, something magical is happening. When you hear it, you can’t help but smile. Shane and Bridget gave me something to hold onto at a time where I lived in metaphorical earthquake country and the ground was constantly in flux. That was the first time Bridget saved my life.
We got to know each other pretty well and solidified acquaintance into friendship. Good times and bad, we made sure we kept each other involved and part of it all. Years passed and situations changed and we each became part of the other’s support network.
2013 was a pretty shitty year for me from beginning to end. Without going into great detail, I was once again living alone besides the kids, staring into the abyss. The kids got to school and were clothed and I spent time with them, but besides that, I was pretty fucked up. The house did not get cleaned. I couldn’t make myself do much of anything. The depression was so crippling that it began to affect me physically in radical ways. Through that time, Bridget encouraged me when everything felt hopeless and helped me retain hope that things would right themselves. She wanted everything to turn out well for me and that I would be happy. Bridget saved my life again during this time, because she was the only person I could talk to and with never a misstep, she kept me safe and sane.
Bridget saved my life for keeps this week, when she became my wife and took me for her husband. This seemed like a sudden move for a lot of people who weren’t privy to how much we have talked over the years, building a bedrock foundation, and how much time we’ve spent together since January when we recognized that not only did we love and care about each other, but that we had fallen in love as well. I don’t talk a lot about myself on a personal level on here, and maybe that’s part of it. I guess I feel like our plans are for us and our own future, and we have been so busy making those plans that honestly, sharing them with everyone has been secondary at best.
Let me assure you, though — this is not a step taken lightly. Thinking about getting married again has brought with it a very minimalist mindset — since we are fully realized adults now and know precisely what we want, the easiest and most expedient way to have it is to be direct, go get it, and just start living.
So we did exactly that.
Thank you to everyone who has offered congratulations and shared their love with either or both of us. Your support is of inestimable value and our appreciation is of reciprocal depth. We love ya.
I have no money, no car, no keys, no ID, and no phone.
Kendall drove me home, got me inside my apartment, stayed with me while I cancelled all the credit cards and changed all of my passwords, took me to the police station to file a report, and brought me back home.
I was able to use iMessage through my macbook to contact my hubby and fill him in. He was driving, and immediately changed direction to come pick me up - 180 miles away.
My purse got stolen but that’s okay, because I have everything I need.
I really want the other side to this story; not because I think Kiki is secretly satan, but because I think the rationale would be HILARIOUS.
She wrote notes for each day that she came to take care of Kiki. She came 4 times total over two different weekends about a month apart. Each time it was about how “upset” Kiki was when she realized it wasn’t me. I was like DUH ARE YOU NEW HERE I MEAN DO YOU EVEN CAT
Do you think they keep asking you to stay because they realize what an asset you are and regret how they made you feel? Or are they just scared to do your work?
They are definitely scared to do my work. I don’t think that they ever imagined that I would leave. Now that I’ve made my decision I can’t imagine ever going back.
I’m incredibly thankful to be in the situation I am in, and I feel truly blessed with love and support. No matter what happens, I’m going to live the hell out of my life, and cherish every minute of it.