June 2012
emilyruthless-deactivated201211 asked: Is your nail polish an Essie called teensiest bikini? I AM WEARING THAT SAME COLOR. If not, it's as close as dildos and Boners, which lets face it, isn't as close as I'd like.
Jun 1st
12 notes
3 tags
Jun 1st
44 notes
1 tag
dorkitude asked: Jumbaco?
Jun 1st
2 notes
Jun 1st
150 notes
9 tags
Jun 1st
17 notes
Jun 1st
22 notes
1 tag
Jun 1st
922 notes
Jun 1st
27 notes
1 tag
Jun 1st
18 notes
4 tags
vegkat replied to your photo: (via yay bubbles thats what i call a good time) Time to shove crayons up our noses.
Jun 1st
6 notes
1 tag
wordishness replied to your photo: (via The Lana Sutra by Erik Ravelo) This shouldn’t excite me, should it? What you’re feeling is perfectly normal. I hope. 
Jun 1st
5 notes
rachelmck: beefranck replied to your post: I bet you got a fine fuckin ass to go with those small tits Oh, Rachel. As a woman your only value comes from your lady parts. Just accept it. It’s my own fault for forgetting that simple fact. Never forget, ladies.
Jun 1st
13 notes
1 tag
Jun 1st
10 notes
Jun 1st
150 notes
Jun 1st
57 notes
3 tags
Jun 1st
23 notes
5 tags
Jun 1st
150 notes
May 2012
May 31st
11 notes
May 31st
36 notes
May 31st
75 notes
5 tags
One of the many things I miss about Penny and...
is the way they would lash out at the television in utter contempt when advertisements came on.
May 31st
19 notes
2 tags
May 31st
66 notes
4 tags
May 31st
13 notes
1 tag
May 31st
49 notes
May 31st
45 notes
1 tag
May 31st
38 notes
1 tag
claviusrobinsky asked: What should I say to the guy who drove past me in the grocery store in the 1988 Lincoln Town car while blasting "In the Air Tonight" by Phil Collins and checking his bald-up-front-so-ponytail-in-back hair-don't in the rear view mirror?
May 31st
17 notes
May 31st
30 notes
May 31st
30 notes
May 31st
154 notes
1 tag
Unsolicited advice
Just one of the many services I provide.
May 31st
13 notes
3 tags
We Get Letters
tj: sunnybucket replied to your photo: I think it’s fair to say that the next month is… Bigger boobs. Big enough for me to play with in Michigan. Why isn’t this obvious to you? Good lord, woman, if they were much bigger I’d essentially be married to a capital P with a head. (Not that there’s anything wrong with that. Except that next year’s anniversary present would probably be some sort of a...
May 31st
15 notes
4 tags
“At one point he wandered over to the next table to give a back massage to his...”
– Playboy Interview « Jon Hamm Source. Jesus H! Roderick wasn’t making it up. (via merlin)
May 31st
67 notes
7 tags
Thank you for indulging me.
raiselm answered your question: Ask me something? Here’s a story for you: Smartgrrl and I are meeting tomorrow for lunch. We’re having sushi in some swanky place in Union Square. I AM GREEN WITH JEALOUS RAGE! sleeppunkypeople answered your question: Ask me something? What’s your favorite drink at Starbucks? I’m about to go there now. I get a large Americano with extra room every morning....
May 31st
8 notes
1 tag
wordishness asked: What was your favorite show from the 70s? Why? Describe, in some detail, which character you would be and why.
May 31st
8 notes
9 tags
May 31st
8 notes
May 31st
31 notes
1 tag
catty1 asked: Once upon a time, in a land far, far away, there lived a beautiful princess in a beautiful castlein a beautiful city. On the eve of her 21st birthday, she was presented with a golden boner, for it was the custom in that land for princesses to receive golden boners on the eves of their 21st birthdays. The princess was thrilled by this gift and left the birthday banquet as swiftly as manners would...
May 31st
6 notes
1 tag
felistella asked: There once was a girl who took excellent care of her teeth. Every day, flossing, brushing, rinsing. One day, her insurance changed, &the new dentist was a flaming asshole, so the girl stopped going. But she kept up her teeth really well. Then one day, her insurance switched again, &she was able to go to her first dentist. Hooray! But because she had neglected to go to the asshole dentist,...
May 31st
7 notes
1 tag
gentleman-mummy asked: When Hans Christian Andersen was a little tiny child, he was taken by his parents to see the procession of their beloved King Frederick VI in public. Hoisted on his father's shoulders, little Hans was disgusted to see that the monarch he'd heard so much about was no divine being, but flesh and blood; and in his irritation he cried "Why, he's nothing more than a human...
May 31st
4 notes
May 31st
33 notes
May 30th
16 notes
1 tag
Ask me something?
Or tell me a story? I’m feeling lonely and melancholy for some reason.
May 30th
15 notes
On Cat Food, Hot Dogs, and Underwear
Cashier: That cat's eating well.
Me: Yes she is.
Cashier: Better than you!
Me: It's a fact!
Cashier: Have you tried these before? How are they?
Me: I'm afraid that is a topic I am not prepared to discuss.
May 30th
21 notes
1 tag
iOS apps that failed to top the charts
wordishness: Roller Rink Finder Find My Genitals Atari 2600 E.T. Emulator ShartMachine! iBritMilah (bris tip calculator) “Find My Genitals”
May 30th
30 notes
2 tags
Hey Rob
What day are we going to the CWS?
May 30th
2 notes
5 tags
May 30th
7 notes
1 tag
One word...
robthebankeriii: Saw a write-up for a luxury condo with monthly homeowners association dues of $2,700. That’s just the dues. It doesn’t include the purchase price or mortgage payment, just the dues. I don’t know what kind of services you get for your $2,700, but in my mind it better include the word ‘swallow’. That would be your standard BBBJTCNQNS and oh god I want my life before...
May 30th
9 notes
May 30th
5,967 notes
1 tag
May 30th
18 notes